I love these recaps and considering this spot has been kinda dead as of late, I thought I'd do this. Click on the link or you're not going to know what the heck this is about.

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Realer Than a Make-Your-Own-Pizza Bar at a College Mixer
• Serena takes a cab every morning to class. Plus 4. And she has lived in New York long enough to know that missing that one cab, which will catch that one light, which will make it to the Central Park cross just in time to miss the slog, will be the difference between arriving late to class and arriving on time. Plus another 4, because we don’t believe in Serena’s analytical skills, but her base knowledge as a New Yorker cannot be denied.
• Joan’s rapey husband’s girlfriend has an audition that involves “a talking dog.” Is this a backhanded jab at Taylor Momsen, who we all know starred in just such a movie? No points, but high five.
• Joan’s rapey husband (whose name apparently is Colin) puts his date in a random cab but gets in a livery cab himself. Plus 3.
• Gossip Girl made a chart of who's hooked up with whom, "Which," Juliet says, "I have to say is very helpful." Plus 2.
• When Serena complains that she’s always late to English Lit, Blair says, “If only there was a device of some kind to keep the time!” Plus 1 for her rapid-fire ability to forget that only one episode ago, she was smashing watches in Cartier.
• The halfheartedly phony way in which Serena says, “Oh, I love her,” regarding Martha Chamberlain is absolutely perfect. Plus 1, because she can’t even bother.
• Rufus drops by the loft to have a heart to heart with Vanessa about her relationship with his son, but while she's talking he looks totally distracted, as though he's actually there for another reason. In fact, when Vanessa tells Rufus that everything is okay with Dan, and there are no “secrets or surprises,” he says: “That’s great” in the same tone Serena said, “I love her!” about a professor she’s never heard of. Plus 3. How many episodes before, in trying to comfort her, he gives her a hug, and one thing leads to another …
• Nate refers to the act of not having sex the first time you stay over at someone’s house as a “page from the Humphrey playbook.” Plus 2, because he could have also said, “I shopped at Gay’s ‘R’ Us and I bought your brand of pussy pants!”
&38226; On the corkboard in Dan’s apartment, there is a black-and-white picture of a handful of shells. Plus 10.
• "A lesbian switcheroo doesn’t make you Blackwater." (No points, because those private-security contracters have been known to pull sexual switcheroos)
• Blair has her minions research “women of power” so she can better become one, and approves when they come up with Time Inc.’s Ann Moore and Pepsico’s Indra Nooyi. But she stops short of Sarah Palin — and it kind of sounds like it’s only because she doesn’t like the middle name “Louise.” Plus 2.
• Blair continues to wear her Hamilton House key while Serena wears a normal (well, if normal had nothing to do with actual college) gold carapace necklace. Plus 2.
• Serena is disappointed that Gossip Girl, who "likes to keep things classy and somewhat true," would ever believe that she, of all people would have an STD. Plus 4. Because really, why would anyone ever think that, when most nights she is home knitting.
• Serena goes to “plant myself on the quad, act like I don’t have a care in the world” … and sits directly in front of the Student Health Center. That’s making a statement! Plus 2.
• Dan: “I don’t know if I can have this same conversation one more time.” It’s true. Men hate having the same conversation over and over. Women, on the other hand, including and perhaps especially Intel Jessica, like to have the same conversation as much as possible. Because you never know, maybe they actually are saying what you want to hear, only in a very cryptic way. Plus 3.
• Professors text now? No points, just, we're old.
• Chuck's lines in this episode are a work of art. "A man with nothing to live for is capable of everything," he hisses at one point. "Who knows my limits since you took away my future?" Who indeed! But we are hoping that in the next episode, they will extend to wearing all black, reading Camus, smoking clove cigarettes, and drinking vermouth. Plus 3.
• After a day in which she is subjected to STD rumors, accused of sending a professor a risqué e-mail, and basically called a tramp by the dean of students at Columbia, Serena takes her chooched-up self to a hotel bar, alone, for a night cap. Plus 10. (Yes, the King Cole Bar is never that empty. But it is the kind of place where a douchebag in a pin-striped suit might show up to harass you at any moment.)
• Wait, Serena finally has a smartphone?? Plus 5.
• Of course Dorota knows what plausible deniability is. She watches a ton of Law & Order. Plus 2.
• We were going to say that no professional college professor, not even a business school professor, would accept a date as a bribe; tell a student, "My class is full. Forever"; or instruct them to, "Tell the dean I quit." But then we remembered this guy. Plus 4.

I laughed out load at this. I can not stand hipster art yet the image of that in Dan's loft makes me crack up.

Second would be the Vufus one.

Rufus drops by the loft to have a heart to heart with Vanessa about her relationship with his son, but while she's talking he looks totally distracted, as though he's actually there for another reason. In fact, when Vanessa tells Rufus that everything is okay with Dan, and there are no “secrets or surprises,” he says: “That’s great” in the same tone Serena said, “I love her!” about a professor she’s never heard of. Plus 3. How many episodes before, in trying to comfort her, he gives her a hug, and one thing leads to another …

VUFUS >>> this show.

JS.

HAHAHA. I lmao'd when this happened because I saw this same kind of chat really recently in a magazine. XD

The "Vulture" article was awesome!! But to me it was between:
#1 "Serena takes a cab every morning to class. Plus 4. And she has lived in New York long enough to know that missing that one cab, which will catch that one light, which will make it to the Central Park cross just in time to miss the slog, will be the difference between arriving late to class and arriving on time. Plus another 4, because we don't believe in Serena’s analytical skills, but her base knowledge as a New Yorker cannot be denied." !!!
#5 "When Serena complains that she’s always late to English Lit, Blair says, “If only there was a device of some kind to keep the time!” Plus 1 for her rapid-fire ability to forget that only one episode ago, she was smashing watches in Cartier"!!!
But #1 is actually a plus 8!!!