So, I was writing this book, and I didn't know if it would ba any good or not, and I want your opinion on it before I continue writing it, maybe publish it, and then make an ass out of myself if it sucks..... So please be a critic on thi exerpt on the first chapter, and any suggestions, any opinions, will be aknowledged. :) Thank you!
Chapter 1
Henna
Well, let’s just say that my life is not normal. In fact, it’s probably at the most least normal level as it could possibly get. I had never even heard of this myth until it had happened to me. Neither have you, because there are no records of it. I am a Masker. I was only 17 when I became one. My creator had told me that I was part of a very secret clan. He said we did good things. I still don’t know what these are. He stopped there. But I at least know this. I am not a human anymore.
I still have the mark from when I became a Masker, it is a long scratch mark on my back,. Five long streaks, from five long claws. I bet you’re thinking something like, “OMG, that is just like a Vampire or Zombie bite!” Well, yeah, same basic idea, but more frightening, trust me, When I woke up from my coma when I was scratched, I almost fainted when I looked in the mirror. I couldn’t faint, I fell on the floor, feeling dizzy. My face looked like a mask. A red mask that looked like there was a cage around my face, but the bars were red. A long red streak ran around the edge of my face, and straight red line going up, down, and across my face. My hands had long claws on the tips of my fingers where my nails used to be. These claws were silver, and VERY shiney and pointy, and very lethal. These claws were impregnated with poison, poison that would turn you into a Masker if you were scratched. That’s what happened to me, but if you were part of another mythological race, you would die. Period.
Basically, before I was turned into a Masker, I was a normal teenager. A normal teenager that lived in Arizona. My friends and family think I was abducted, they are still looking for me. I have seen the headlines on the internet, the ‘Have you seen this girl?’ posters. I feel so sorry for them, and I want to get back at these bastards for doing this to me. I even had a boyfriend, and if I had a choice, he would know what really happened to me. But of course, there is still all this “we are a secret race,” bullshit.
Well, my life has now been turned around, and my future completly gone to shit, because this bastard named Rick turned me into a Masker. I just wanted to ring him around the neck for payback, and don’t think I didn’t try, but when I tried to strangle him, he burned white hot, my hands still hurt a bit, but I’ll be fine. One upside to Maskers is we heal quick. I guess that’s part of our magic abilities. Healing and burning is all I have discovered so far, but when I find out more of our magic, I swear, Rick is gonna burn in hell.
Chapter 1
Henna
Well, let’s just say that my life is not normal. In fact, it’s probably at the most least normal level as it could possibly get. I had never even heard of this myth until it had happened to me. Neither have you, because there are no records of it. I am a Masker. I was only 17 when I became one. My creator had told me that I was part of a very secret clan. He said we did good things. I still don’t know what these are. He stopped there. But I at least know this. I am not a human anymore.
I still have the mark from when I became a Masker, it is a long scratch mark on my back,. Five long streaks, from five long claws. I bet you’re thinking something like, “OMG, that is just like a Vampire or Zombie bite!” Well, yeah, same basic idea, but more frightening, trust me, When I woke up from my coma when I was scratched, I almost fainted when I looked in the mirror. I couldn’t faint, I fell on the floor, feeling dizzy. My face looked like a mask. A red mask that looked like there was a cage around my face, but the bars were red. A long red streak ran around the edge of my face, and straight red line going up, down, and across my face. My hands had long claws on the tips of my fingers where my nails used to be. These claws were silver, and VERY shiney and pointy, and very lethal. These claws were impregnated with poison, poison that would turn you into a Masker if you were scratched. That’s what happened to me, but if you were part of another mythological race, you would die. Period.
Basically, before I was turned into a Masker, I was a normal teenager. A normal teenager that lived in Arizona. My friends and family think I was abducted, they are still looking for me. I have seen the headlines on the internet, the ‘Have you seen this girl?’ posters. I feel so sorry for them, and I want to get back at these bastards for doing this to me. I even had a boyfriend, and if I had a choice, he would know what really happened to me. But of course, there is still all this “we are a secret race,” bullshit.
Well, my life has now been turned around, and my future completly gone to shit, because this bastard named Rick turned me into a Masker. I just wanted to ring him around the neck for payback, and don’t think I didn’t try, but when I tried to strangle him, he burned white hot, my hands still hurt a bit, but I’ll be fine. One upside to Maskers is we heal quick. I guess that’s part of our magic abilities. Healing and burning is all I have discovered so far, but when I find out more of our magic, I swear, Rick is gonna burn in hell.
I’m just putting it out there that the random fan club is for posting anything and everything hence the name the random fan club and those who don’t understand that should be removed from this club as the word random means being weird or not normal just means to be different to be unique to be a thing for all things i always thought that the random fan club could be a MLP comment the below it a HP comment if no one understands this then the meaning of the random fan club lives no longer so i beg for you to see reason this club is for everyone to post everything and anything they want see reason it is a fact being random is a good thing but blocking out peoples randomness is not cool bros
The moment you took your life
I felt mine ended too.
If I could only turn back time
there’s so much I would undo.
I didn’t see the warning signs.
You held them deep inside.
Struggles you were going through
you did so well to hide.
I’m left with guilt and sorrow,
and confusion as to why
you didn’t tell me of your pain
and felt you had to die.
The Sadness of the sight was just to much to bare
And now its me lying here
Cold,Crimson and Dead
You will never know how I feel inside,
The pain that still resides,
Happiness was once in my life,
Those days have long since ceased.
I felt mine ended too.
If I could only turn back time
there’s so much I would undo.
I didn’t see the warning signs.
You held them deep inside.
Struggles you were going through
you did so well to hide.
I’m left with guilt and sorrow,
and confusion as to why
you didn’t tell me of your pain
and felt you had to die.
The Sadness of the sight was just to much to bare
And now its me lying here
Cold,Crimson and Dead
You will never know how I feel inside,
The pain that still resides,
Happiness was once in my life,
Those days have long since ceased.
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This is really stupid but I was feeling bored...
This is really stupid but I was feeling bored...
"Do you hear that?"Alicia asked."What?"Henry and Sarah asked."That,that,that sound.It's like."Alicia banged the floor."No.I don't hear anything."Said Sarah."Come here."Alicia said.
They got out.
Alicia beckoned them.
"There!It's getting louder!"
The banging continued.
Alicia found herself in the woods.
She stopped.
Henry and Sarah caught up to her.
Alicia covered her mouth.
"What.Is.I-i-it?"Alicia asked.
Down the steep hill.Was a door the door was buried in the ground.under leaves.
The three friends stepped down.The noise grew louder.Henry and Sarah could hear it now.
Alicia was down first.She saw a keyhole.Alicia looked for the key.
"ALICIA!"Sarah said.
Alicia looked down,stopped her foot from going down,And backed up.A blood puddle.
"Oh my go-"
"The key!It's in the blood!"Henry said.
"Ew!I'm not picking it up!"Alicia said.
Sarah looked around and pushed Henry forward.
Henry picked up the key,And put it in the keyhole...
They got out.
Alicia beckoned them.
"There!It's getting louder!"
The banging continued.
Alicia found herself in the woods.
She stopped.
Henry and Sarah caught up to her.
Alicia covered her mouth.
"What.Is.I-i-it?"Alicia asked.
Down the steep hill.Was a door the door was buried in the ground.under leaves.
The three friends stepped down.The noise grew louder.Henry and Sarah could hear it now.
Alicia was down first.She saw a keyhole.Alicia looked for the key.
"ALICIA!"Sarah said.
Alicia looked down,stopped her foot from going down,And backed up.A blood puddle.
"Oh my go-"
"The key!It's in the blood!"Henry said.
"Ew!I'm not picking it up!"Alicia said.
Sarah looked around and pushed Henry forward.
Henry picked up the key,And put it in the keyhole...